Establishing Trust In Your Marriage!
That’s something that’s earned, right?
I mean, we don’t just put our trust in anyone (or anything) unless we are sure they (or it) is worthy of it.
What about when God asks us to trust him? That can be difficult for some, especially for new believers where no track record of trust has been established yet.
So how do we establish trust with God, and subsequently develop trust in our marriage?
God Is Always Good!
This first thing we have to get straight is that God is ALWAYS and ONLY good. The Word tells us “His (God’s) plans for us are to prosper us not to harm us, to give us a hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11). It also tells us “He wishes above all things that we would prosper and be in health, even as our souls prosper” (3 John 2). And there are many other places in the Bible that show us God’s intentions towards us. He comes right out and tells us who we are in Christ Jesus…it’s not hidden. AND it’s all good!
So He is absolutely worthy of putting our trust in!
Some may have doubts about this because they see bad things happening in the world, or in their own particular lives and families. Certainly there are horrible things going on, sometimes unimaginable calamites, trials or devastating circumstances. But we need to know that God does not orchestrate bad or evil things.
Unpleasant things happen because of the fallen world we live in. But the good news is God gave us a way out, a way of protection from the things going on around us…His name is Jesus, and His sacrifice for us was a “once and done” deal. It was enough to satisfy God relative to man’s sin…once for all!
AND, God is the same yesterday, today and forever! Se He has not changed His mind on this! (Hebrews 13:8).
Your Spouse Is Not Your Enemy!
After we get our thinking clear about God and realize He is
more than worthy of our trust, we next have to extend trust to our spouse. One thing we tell couples a lot is this…”your spouse is not your enemy”. In other words, “you’re on the same team”.
- Will we let each other down sometimes? Certainly!
- Is there a chance trust will be violated? Sure!
- Will there be disappointments? Yup!
But when we take a step back from the things that happen to us (or that we think were done to us) we can choose to see things in a different light. Maybe through God’s eyes? Now there’s a noble idea! LOL
We all sin and fall short, and God still loves us, still forgives us, and He still believes in us. So when we feel wronged, what gives us the right to hold unforgiveness against the other person for an extended (sometimes indefinite) period of time? God forgives us, so we need to extend forgiveness too. Not doing so would be putting ourselves above Him.
Vertical Trust B4 Horizontal Trust!
We’ve said it many times in classes we’ve taught, small groups we’ve led and in individual counseling…
…when your relationship (trust) with God is right, then your relationship (trust) with your spouse can be right.
Any earthly relationship will not be “as right” as it can be until our relationship with God is “as right” as it can be. That has to come first. That’s why we started out this blog with God first. Trust in God! Then trust can flow in your marriage!
Helpful? Let us know! We’d love to hear from you.